The first date is typically the most nerve-wracking part of a relationship. It is the first time you are meeting with someone – there never can be a second first impression. You want to create a good impression on your date and so you have to plan out your outfit, which perfume to wear, what you should say – it is a whole process!
The science behind dating has evolved quite a bit in recent years thanks to new research about human behavior and psychology, and so it has become easier to know what to expect and what not to expect on a first date. Every individual and every date will not be the same, but there are some generalized tips that can help you avoid any awkward moments during your first date and can help you make it a successful one.
So, before your next date, take some advice from these ten scientifically-backed tips for first dates:
1. Choose an unconventional location for your first date
Sure, dinners and movies are the most sought-after activities to do on a first date, but you do not have to do that because everyone else is. If that is not your style, you can choose to do something fun and different on a first date like go to a concert, go to a sports game if you both are into sports – the options are virtually endless.
You can customize your first date by choosing a location that both of you can feel comfortable in, and have a good time.
2. Dress appropriately for the occasion
Wherever you do decide on going for your date, it is important to dress accordingly. If you plan on going to a fancy restaurant, then wearing basic casuals will not be appropriate. You also do not want to be overdressed by wearing a dinner jacket to go to the bowling alley for your first date.
If you want to create a good impression on your date, then you should consider planning your outfit according to where you are going.
3. Phones away, please!
Everyone is dependent on their phones nowadays, and understandably so. But still, when you are on your first date or any other date for that matter, it goes without saying that all the attention should be on your date, and your phone should not get any priority. Constantly using and checking your phone seems rude and offensive to the person you are on a date with.
Only in the case of an emergency would it be appropriate to use your phone when on your first date.
4. Carry some conversation starters to have more engaging talks with your date
Every first date could have some awkward pauses in between as both of you may be nervous and could momentarily not be able to think of anything to talk about. So it is always a good idea to carry some conversation starters so that you do not have any bumps in your conversation with your date.
They are also a great way to get to know more about your date and to establish a bond with your date. Here is a list of conversation starters that can help you during your first date.
5. Focus more on your date than yourself
It is understandable that you would want to make a good impression on your date, but that does not mean that you go on talking about yourself and not allow your date to speak.
You can make an even better impression on your date by allowing them to speak and being a good listener.
6. Take things slow
A first date is just that – your first step towards a potential relationship. The interaction between the two of you should go at its own pace and a connection should not be forced or accelerated. Rushing into anything is not a good idea as it can make your date feel uncomfortable.
Enjoy your time together and let things unfold on their own, it will be more precious and memorable this way.
7. Do not be clingy
There is a fine line between being interested in someone and being clingy. You need to know where to draw the line so that you do not come off as desperate and make your date feel uncomfortable. Try to maintain the balance and know when to get close with your date and when not to.
Usually, there will be moments that will dictate what you need to do, so it is better to wait for those moments and make the best of them rather than trying to just look for excuses to get close with your date.
8. Strictly no exes!
Your first date should just be about the two of you, and nobody else. Bringing your ex into the picture and stating that they used to do things a certain way is not going to help anyone. In fact, it may give the impression that you are still hung up on your ex and are not ready to be with anyone else.
In any case, it is never a good idea to talk about your ex, especially not on your first date.
9. Be yourself!
Your date has chosen to go out with YOU, so be confident and believe in yourself, and do not try to be someone else just to impress your date. Pretending to be someone you are not just to establish a connection between the two of you will not do any favors, and could actually cause problems down the road.
The pressure of a first date is understandable, but try to take things slow so that your first date will not be stressful, but will actually be enjoyable.
Dating is an exhilarating experience, yet the thrill of it is unparalleled, and with the right approach and attitude, your date may end up being more memorable than you imagined.
If you have never been on a first date before, or are still feeling nervous and could use a little boost of self-esteem before your next first date, contact CGull to help you be more confident and enhance your overall personality. We offer a range of services including dating coaching and personal consulting sessions, where we can work with you one-on-one to make sure that your confidence is as high as possible going into any new social situation.